A GENERATION OF YOUNG CHRISTIAN

*A Generation of Young Christians:*

_1. We are always right and we never *accept correction*. A corrector is seen as an enemy._

*2.* We love to sing in Church, but *do not read our Bible* at home.

*3.* We are full of *lust, sensuality and emotions* and we call it love.

*4.* We want to have wonderful marriages, but by the time we are 25 years we've already spent almost ten years in relationships. Sometimes, we may have had *more* boy lovers and girl lovers than even our parents.

*5.* Sexual activities are *now part of our relationships* calling it romance.

*6.* We want to be rich in life, meanwhile, we *spend all our finances on the latest ipads, iphone, laptops, cameras, smartphones, etc,* which in many cases we uses less than 30% of their functions.

*7.* We do not pay our *tithes and offerings* claiming we are students.

*8.* We say we are Christian men & women but *dress like hollywood stars* and we call it fashion.

*9.* We love *pleasures* rather than God.

*10.* In Church you will see us with our hands lifted up singing slow songs which we call worship but *on our phones in our pockets,* you will see pics of naked and half naked women, hip hop, Antichrist, etc and we have a nice way of justifying it.

*11.* We are hardly convicted when we go to Church because *our hearts have been hardened* by the deceitfulness of sin and pride.

But God foresaw these and warned us in 2 Timothy 3 That *In the last days men and women will be lovers of themselves, lovers of money, boasters, proud, blasphemers, disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy, unloving, unforgiving, slanderers, without self-control, brutal, despisers of good, traitors, headstrong, haughty, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God, having a form of godliness but denying its power.*

We need to change our ways, we have *no excuse on judgement day.*

I know its wrong packed, but someone can really  get helped from the same massage

THE POWER OF SAYING ''NO''

THE POWER OF SAYING ''NO''

Two letters in the English language seem to be some of the most difficult for people to say to each other: No.

I have struggled with saying ‘no’, and my friends, family, and the teens I have worked with also struggle with saying ‘no’. Despite the struggle we have all experienced with saying ‘no’, we place high expectations on teenagers to be able to say it when they are being put under pressure in serious situations by their peers. Saying ‘no’ is such a powerful weapon and is a concept that we should be teaching teens through example. 

Why is saying ‘no’ so difficult, even for adults? Here are some reasons that lead to the internal struggle of verbalizing ‘no’. 

1. We are (kind of) brainwashed.

Since being a child, I have been taught that saying ‘no’ is rude. I should not refuse any food at a table even if I know I do not like it. I should not reject a friendship even if I do not enjoy that person. I should never reject a gift, no matter how horrible it is. Then, as a teenager I was told to say ‘no’ to boys, sex, drugs, alcohol, and any other ‘rebellious’ behavior. It felt like a sudden shift from never saying ‘no’ to being forced to say it in situations that are uncomfortable.

As adults, we need to focus on how hard it really is for teenagers to go from the expectation of never refusing anything to refusing those things that they may feel pressured into doing by their peers. Trusted adults should help teens understand when saying ‘no’ is acceptable and how to say it tactfully in those tough situations.

2. Saying ‘no’ once does not mean ‘no’ all the time.

As a teenager and young adult, I always worried that if I said ‘no’ to going out or spending time with friends, those people would never invite me out again, or I would be forgotten. This constant worry of being left out is a concept that can carry over into adulthood if it is not addressed early on. Tenageers have a need to be liked and accepted by their peers which can lead to difficulty navigating negative situations.

Adults should be models of what healthy friendships look like, which often includes saying ‘no’, even when everyone else may be saying ‘yes’. Helping teens understand how to build trust that someone will be there even when they say ‘no’ occasionally is an important aspect of learning how to develop their boundaries. Saying ‘no’ to hanging out is not the end all be all and can actually be really beneficial. Teens need to be reminded that saying ‘no’ does not need to include long excuses or reasons. If a person is truly a friend, they will still be there even when you sometimes say ‘no’.

3. How we can help teens learn the power of ‘no’?

Encourage teens to be assertive when the situation calls for it. This is a difficult concept (even for some adults), so it is crucial that we educate teens on how to be assertive without becoming aggressive. This can start with talking to teens about these topics:

Help teens understand their boundaries. What are they comfortable doing and what makes them uncomfortable?

Ask teens about their priorities or goals. Understanding how their decisions now can affect their futures can be a good incentive to learn to say ‘no’ when it matters.

Teens often have a role model that they admire. Ask them who are their role model is and why. Are they a role model for someone? I know several teens that have talked about how they need to be better because their younger sibling needs them. This can be a great incentive for a teen to learn how to say ‘no’ assertively in any situation.

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FIVE STEPS PLAN FOR RESTORATION

  FIVE STEPS PLAN FOR RESTORATION

Step One – In The Beginning Do As Little As Possible

That may sound counterproductive. It may sound like a lack of leadership. However it will save you a bunch of pain in the future. At the beginning of a crisis, all the forces of nature and emotion are telling you to respond. Your first instinct is to react. A good leader doesn’t react, they lead.

The biggest mistake I see boards, staff members, and members of a congregation make is that they make decisions in the midst of their pain. They react due to their pain and disappointment. Any time we make decisions when we are wounded, we make decisions that are not healthy.

So, other than the possible need to cooperate with law enforcement officials, do not make any decisions until you have worked through your pain and disappointment. You are angry, embarrassed, shocked, and questioning everything you have believed about this man and his motives. This is not the time to compound things by operating out of these type of emotions.

I would suggest that you do not accept any resignations yet. I would suggest that you do not permanently remove the fallen leader from office yet. Yes, you may need to put them on administrative leave, or suspend their appointment from office for a season, but until you have dealt with yourself, do not make any permanent decisions until you have had time to digest the news, deal with your heart issues that this has caused, and evaluated and came up with a plan of restoration.Recently I saw another church leader fall in one of the nations mega churches with over 20,000 members. In less than one week, all references to him were removed from the church website, church broadcast ministries, and other communications from the church.

I can’t help but think about what this communicates to his family, friends, and the thousands of people who were touched by this man’s ministry. What does this say to the man’s wife who shared her husband for 29 years with the same people who removed all mention of him? What does this say to the children who had less time with their dad because he was serving these same people? What does it say to the congregation and thousands of people who were touched by his ministry?

As much as you might be embarrassed by the situation or feel the need to uphold biblical standards, what about the biblical standard of healing the brokenhearted?

Step Two- Evaluate The Root Cause Of The Failure

After you have gotten over your anger, disappointment, embarrassment, and questioning, then you are ready to objectively look at the issue. It is not just about what the sin was that the man committed. It is about what led up to the point where the man gave in to the temptation to sin.

I do not believe, and I think that if you honestly stop and think about it I think you will agree, that the vast majority of pastors do not go into ministry in order to fail. They go into ministry based on a sense of call from God and a desire to help others.

They do not start out planning for the day that they will step into moral failure. In fact I believe that they all believe at the time they start that they will never face such a situation.

What happens is that something happens from the time that they start and the time that they fail. This is where we need to step in an evaluate what was the root cause.

Many pastors fall due to burnout. They become tired physically and emotionally and that causes them to become weak spiritually. A life out of balance in one area is out of balance in all areas.

So the question to ask was if the church, board, or the pastor himself put demands upon him that were not healthy. What can be changed about this?

Some pastors fall due to a lack of balance of power. They have been given too much authority and not enough accountability and this leads to a pride problem. (Proverbs 18:16) Part and parcel with this is a lack of transparent culture.

If we have a performance based structure where failure is not allowed, then there is no room for a pastor to be honest about his struggles and trials. He has to always be the spiritual super hero without any clay feet.

So the question to ask is if there is a way to change this in order to prevent this from happening again and if the circumstances is changed, is there a way to then restore the man to the office after a solid restoration plan is proposed and accepted?

Look at the demands of supporting his family, spending time with his family, having quality intimate encounters with his wife alone and ministering to her woman’s heart. Were there demands that were placed upon him that made these things problematic? A man who has a healthy home life is not nearly as tempted to stray from his wife than one who has an unhealthy home life.

I cannot address every issue that might be the root cause. I am sure they are as myriad as there are churches. However I would encourage you to look beyond the obvious. I would almost guarantee that the problem goes beyond counseling women alone, being in control of the finances, lack of willpower, or just a choice to sin.

Step Three – Develop A Plan Of Restoration

This step depends on your understanding of leadership and restoration.

Some will feel that restoration can only go so far and that a person will not be able to be restored back to senior leadership or other types of leadership.

This is not just about the divorce and remarriage issue but can be about many other things like pedophilia. I personally would not restore a pedophile to any sort of leadership that had anything to do with leading children or families. That is just common sense.

However, I would say that a person who has fallen to pedophilia still needs to be restored to relationship with God. So, you will need to wrestle with the issue of how far you can restore someone and how to offer a plan of restoration to the fallen leader.

In any biblical restoration plan, there needs to be repentance, and reconciliation. Included with that is what you have discerned as the issues that set the stage for the failure in the first place. I would suggest you devise a plan where the fallen leader acknowledges this failure and that it was sin.

Depending on the situation this should include engaging directly with the parties involved in the sin, and with those that the sin has affected. A personal acknowledgement of guilt and sorrow is appropriate along with an affirmation about God’s perspective on the failure.

The second part is reconciliation. This goes beyond repentance but it is the asking of forgiveness for what they have done. I do not believe that a general request for forgiveness is sufficient. I believe that it needs to be personal between the offender and the offended. It needs to be personal since the offense personally affected everyone offended.

The next stage needs to be restorative. The fallen leader needs to deal with the failure and the reasons the failure happened.

If they were burned out, then a sabbatical is in order. If they had their priorities out of order and their family life was suffering then marriage counseling, family counseling, and a total reevaluation of priorities is in order. If there was a lack of accountability and a culture that has a lack of transparency then a revision of power structures and safe places to be transparent need to be established.

I cannot give a time frame for this to happen but I would caution you to not to make it happen in a time frame, but set real goals and spiritual marks that need to be seen before the leader is restored.

Step 4 – Restore In Stages

One of the things I see churches do is restore without allowing trust to be rebuilt. They have a leader fall, they take him or her through a restoration process and then restore them right back to their original leadership position.

I do not think this is wise nor takes into account the hearts of those that were wounded. Restore the person in leadership in stages. Allow time for the people to see that the leader is once again qualified to lead. Let them interact with the leader and their family. Let them see that they can once again trust the leader.

If it was a pastor who fell, then let them start by leading a small group or Sunday school class. Slowly advance them back up through the various ministries of the church.

Not only will this show the congregation that they can trust the leader, but it will show that the leader is walking once again in humility. It will also show that not only does your church live by its moral standards but it also shows that your church is a restorative body rather than a punitive body.

Step 5 – Celebrate Restoration

The problem with the way most churches handle fallen leaders is that they punish failure. They dismiss the fallen leader, start teaching why the dismissal was necessary and once again reaffirm their moral standards. While I do not have a problem with churches having moral standards and the teaching of those standards to their parishioners, I think there is a more excellent way.

Instead of just removing the fallen leader and cleaning up the mess, I would suggest to you that you celebrate restoration.

It will be a lot messier, and there will have to be a lot of transparency and accountability involved that scares a bunch of people, but in the end it will teach your church and your community that Jesus restores sinners, both inside and outside the church.

This more excellent way will challenge you. It will call you to lay down your embarrassment for what has happened.

It will cause you to love when you want to think only of yourself. It will cause you to place the hearts of people over the reputation of the institution however if you will take this path less traveled, you will see the community coming to love and respect you for being authentic followers of Jesus.

12 tips Character Development

What is character?

 A  modern definition is known as the sum of all the attributes, such as integrity, courage, fortitude, honesty, and loyalty, in a person.

Why is character important?

Every decision you make either improves or degrades your character. Why do we care? Because society will break down and the way of life that we enjoy to will fall apart if all of us do not promote and encourage good character. Emerson said, “Men of character are the conscience of the society in which they live.” Our conscience needs improving. Improvement that must begin with each us.

To strengthen one’s character requires dedication, effort and knowledge. Remember, you don’t have to try to improve every aspect of character every day. Pick one and work on it. 

12 tips to improving your character

1. Knowledge: Know what makes up good character. Many traits or aspects make up character. There can be both good and bad traits. Sometimes merely the absence of a good character trait can be a fatal flaw. None of us is perfect, but knowing what makes up good and bad character is a start.

1. Awareness: Know yourself. Being aware of one’s thoughts, feelings and emotions, is key to being able to improve any aspect of their life. You must know your starting point and be brutally honest with yourself about your strengths and your weaknesses.

1. Truth: Seek the truth. Do not lie to yourself. Delusion will not help you improve. Having a good friend or mentor will help. An individual that you trust and respect to tell you the truth.

1. Self-Control: Guard against irrational impulses. Aristotle and Aquinas considered that there are seven human passions: love and hatred, desire and fear, joy and sadness, and anger. While good in themselves, these passions can bypass our intellect and cause us to indulge in the wrong things: eat too much food, fear things irrationally, or become overwhelmed in sadness or by anger. Practice delayed gratification.

1. Contentment: Be content with your lot (not imitating). Appreciate your own values and that which you have. Imagining that the grass is greener somewhere else is a recipe for lifelong unhappiness; remember that doing so is actually projecting your assumptions about how others live. It is better to focus on how you live.

1. Brave: Take calculated risks. Life itself is risk. You can choose to avoid risk, but such action rarely yields results. It is best to face the situation, evaluate it calmly, formulate a plan and press forward. Like forming metal into a useable tool, forging character takes heat and pressure. The heat and pressure of risk and failure.

1. Compassion: Learn to do good and care. Watch for opportunities to extend a helping hand to your fellow person. Sometimes, just a smile to show you care is enough. Maybe the act of simply sharing your lunch with someone or holding a door open for someone with their hands full. Compassion can take many shapes.

1. Help: Get an accountability partner. Having someone to talk to and help you look at your situation honestly is invaluable. Your partner must be someone you trust and are willing to take their criticism of you.

1. Gratitude: Focus on the positives in life. All to often, we dwell on the bad things in life. The troubles, difficulties and challenges. Don’t ignore them, they have to be dealt with, but do not focus on them either. You should think about the good in your life. Cicero said that, “Gratitude is not only the greatest of virtues, but the parent of all the others.”

1. Patience: Improvement takes time: Forging character takes time and hard work. You must have patience to allow yourself time to improve. Your accountability partner can help in several ways. They can encourage you, but most importantly they will likely see a change before you do.

1. Diligence: You must guard your hard won character. Take care of your precious character. While creating it takes time and effort, losing it completely can be the result of one poor decision.

1. Record: Keep a journal of your journey. Keep notes on what aspects you are trying to improve. Record your challenges, your failures and your successes. Objectively review this with your accountability partner.

THE POWER OF THE VISION

“I think that the greatest gift God ever gave man is not the gift of sight but the gift of vision,” Dr. Munroe says. “Sight is a function of the eyes, but vision is a function of the heart. When a person doesn’t have a vision, they live by their eyes. That means we live by what we see. That’s one of the reasons why people are so depressed, and that’s why the future never becomes a reality.

“Vision is a source of hope; it’s the source of courage; it’s the source of perseverance in the midst of difficulty.”“The most important thing that I ever discovered was the power of a seed,” he says. “I believe that in every seed there’s a forest. If you have an apple seed, in that apple seed is an apple tree. There’s also apples on that apple tree. So in that one seed you really have a forest.

“How do you get a forest out of a seed is the question you ask. ‘How do I get my vision out of my life?’ The first thing you need to do is to deal with the environment. You take the seed, and you put it in the right environment.

“No matter how old a person is -- they may feel 60, 70, 80 years old. The good news today is if you can get back in the right environment, your dream can still come to pass. It’s not what you’re carrying that’s important. It’s the environment it’s in. I believe that’s why the Bible says, ‘In the presence of the Lord there’s fullness of joy.’

“What you believe in creates your environment in your life and in your heart. It also creates how you see things. Vision really is God exposing the true environment of your life to you in the midst of your present environment. In other words, you see your real self.

“You cannot guide a ship that’s parked. So you find in the book of Proverbs, chapter 16, a very interesting statement made by God. It says, ‘The heart of man makes his plans, and the Lord directs the steps of the plan.’ We’re basically saying, ‘I’m waiting on God.’ God would say, ‘I’m really waiting on you. Why don’t you tell Me what you want to do with your life? Show Me what’s in your heart.’

“People think that their dream is outside of them. So they go looking for prophets – wanting somebody to prophesy to them, going to some crusade, some meeting, some religious leader. You’ll never find it that way. God hid your future in a place where He knew you couldn’t miss it. He hid it within you.

“So what do you desire to do? What do you really want to do as a person? You need to stop and document that; write it down; make a plan; and then God says, ‘I’ll direct your steps.’

“If what you saw in your vision is not what you see now, then what you see is always temporary. So you enjoy what you’re doing now with all your heart because it’s preparation for the next phase.’ I say, ‘Look, you’ve got the greatest asset in the world to begin with. You’ve got your own mind and your own self. You are your best raw material.’

“When you connect that self to Him then you connect yourself to unlimited resources. When you believe in your dream and your vision, then it begins to attract its own resources. No one was born to be a failure.”

PLAN, PURPOSE AND POWER

PLAN, PURPOSE AND POWER

Plan will suffer paralysis without power, it is power that enlivens vision and turns purpose into reality.

Without power vision will turn into delusion and corruption.

Programs without power will end in frustration.

Many have never seen fulfillment of vision not because God has changed his plan but because they fail to generate the power to make it happen.

Fulfillment of vision is at the mercy of power.

As you receive divine plan and program from God with one hand, wait in prayer to receive power to perform with the other hand. Lk. 4:14.

Jesus had the plan but waited for the power. So also, he commanded the disciples never to go ahead with the plan even though available until they be filled with power from on high. Acts.1:5-8.

Moses couldn’t carry out the exodus plan without power. Deut. 32:11, Ex. 3:1-21.

Power from on high is what enables man to perform on the earth.

Ten Principles of Leadership

   When people decide to respect you as a leader, they observe what you do so they can know who you really are.

People then use this observation to tell if you are an honorable and trusted leader, or a self-serving person who misuses authority.

A good leader has an honorable character that selflessly serves his/her organization. In your employees’ eyes, your leadership is everything. Your activities affect the organization’s objectives and their well-being.

A respected leader concentrates on three key areas:

1. “Be” – what he/she is, i.e. beliefs and values

2. “Know” – what he/she knows, i.e. job, tasks, human nature

3. “Do” – what he/she does, i.e. implement, motivate, and provide direction

What makes a person want to follow a leader? People want to be guided by people they respect and who have a clear sense of direction. To gain respect, they must be ethical. A sense of direction is achieved by conveying a strong vision of the future.

The Three Most Important Keys of Leadership:

Studies have shown that trust and confidence in top leadership is the single most reliable predictor of employee satisfaction in an organization.

Effective communication by leadership in three critical areas is the key to winning organizational trust and confidence, and involves:

1. Helping employees understand the company’s overall business strategy.

2. Helping employees understand how they contribute to achieving key business objectives.

3. Sharing information with employees on both how the company is doing and how an employee’s own division or department is doing – relative to strategic business objectives.

So basically, you must be trustworthy and you have to be able tocommunicate a vision of where you are going.

The 10 Principles of Leadership:

1. Know yourself and seek self-improvement. In order to know yourself, you have to understand your “be”, “know”, and “do” attributes. This is possible by continually strengthening your attributes by reading and self-study.

2. Be technically proficient. As a leader, you must know your job and have a solid familiarity with your employees’ jobs.

3. Seek responsibility and take responsibility for your actions. Search for ways to guide your organization to new heights. And when things go wrong, do not blame others.

4. Make sound and timely decisions. Use good problem solving, decision-making, and planning tools.

5. Set the example. Be a good role model for you employees. They will believe what they see not what they hear.

6. Know your people and look out for their well-being. Know human nature and the importance of sincerely caring for your workers.

7. Keep your people informed. Know how to communicate with your people, seniors, and other key people within the organization.

8. Develop a sense of accountability, ownership and responsibility in your people.These traits will help them carry out their professional responsibilities.

9. Ensure that tasks are understood, supervised, and accomplished.Communication is the key to this responsibility.

10. Train your people as a team. By developing team spirit, you will be able to employ your organization, department, section, etc. to its fullest capabilities.